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October 11, 2004

What would Nigella do?

So, imagine the scene. It's been a lovely weekend, and you're reclining in the living room with the fabulous party episode of 'Green Wing' on for the second time. There's some great food on the table, and you're settling back with a nice glass of red.

But disaster strikes!

An unforeseen and ill-timed coughing incident (or was it a cat, or just plain clumsiness, I can't remember) means a huge great glop of red wine leaves your glass and lands on the sofa cushions.

(Actually, this isn't a complete disaster. The sofa is red. Our cream rug would have been a disaster.)

But you're not fazed. You know what to do. There's already some sauv blanc in the fridge so a quick slosh of that goes over the top. Just time to drop some salt on and you'll be fine.

And then, with a sinking sensation, you realise just how deeply middle class you've become.

Rock salt for salt mills - check.
Maldon sea salt - check.
Bog standard bucket of Saxa - um, nope.

And so for five minutes you would have been party to the sight of me frantically seasoning our sofa from a beautifully designed brushed steel salt mill, while desperately trying to get the screw at the top done up tight enought to produce fine grains.

As they say, never forget where you've come from...

Posted by Tom Dolan at October 11, 2004 10:29 PM

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Check your salt,

Add to that...

Weird salt for dishwasher
Poncy 'Salt and sesame seeds and Japanese seaweed Furikare-style seasoning salt
Really old rocksalt for making interesting patterns whilst dyeing cloth for 'craft projects'
And two 2kg bags of table salt because me and the wife 'got confused about who was ordering what from Ocado'.

I guess that's what happens when you worship the Fat Ladies, and your G/f has a weird Nigella fetish.

Posted by: kim at October 13, 2004 01:58 PM

soda water. the ultimate red wine removerer(er)

Posted by: Saltation at October 14, 2004 10:52 PM

I always thought salt was for people too poor to waste white wine on red wine spills.

Which is mostly me.

Posted by: Piers at October 15, 2004 01:27 AM

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